I'm not spoiled, I'm just well taken care of.
If we're not supposed to have late night snacks....why is there a light in the fridge?
When you're sober you think twice before you speak but when you're drunk you speak twice before you think.
Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
Sadly some boys think of girls as books; If the cover doesn't catch their eye they don't bother to read whats inside.
We just have to accept the fact that some people are going to stay in our hearts....even if they don't stay in our lives.
You'll never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.
I'm so broke I can't even pay attention.
Those awkward karate chops you give door just incase it shocks you.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
The greatest part of being imperfect, is being perfect at it.
There's no such thing as good girls gone bad, only bad girls found out.
Don't make time for people who can't make time for you.
I'm not flirting, I'm just acting extra nice to someone who is extra attractive.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
It's hard to answer "what's wrong", when nothing is right...
Real eyes realize real lies.
Make money, don't let it make you.