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I'm not spoiled, I'm just well taken care of.

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He who laughs last thinks slowest.

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Cool story bro. Put it in the history books with all the other boring sh*t I don't care about.

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Bought a CD of ice cream van music. Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces.

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I knew I was in love when all those stupid love songs started to make sense.

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The awkward moment when you realize that people are really laughing at you, not with you.

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I'm not a nerd, I'm just smarter then you.

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Jingle bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away, Bella died, Jacob cried, POTTER ALL THE WAY!!

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My foot just fell asleep. I think I'm gonna kick it with your face to wake it up.

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If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.

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Have you ever noticed that when you walk into a spider web you suddenly become a ninja?

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That moment when your mum shouts your name so you do a quick recap of all the things you've done recently to see if you're in trouble.

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I miss you like an idiot misses the point.

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Nice shoes! Wanna screw?

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That awkward moment when it's not okay after an apology.

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I'm not giving you an hour, or a second, or another minute longer. I'm busy getting stronger.

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Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.

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I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

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Negativity is poison for the soul.