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The world is full of guys, be a man.

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Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

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Everyone keeps telling me how fun Angry Birds is, but I've been insulting my parakeet all week and he just seems hurt.

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When life puts you in tough situations don't say "WHY ME?", just say "TRY ME".

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He who laughs last didn't get it.

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Don't wait for the perfect moment, take the moment and make it perfect.

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Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?

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"**** ***** is now friends with ****** ****** and 64 other people" damn....what a Facebook whore.

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Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.

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Don't erase your haters, embrace your haters.

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Lifes a bitch....so when life sucks just sit back and enjoy the head.

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Man: created by God, destroyed by a women.

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Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.

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Don't let the world change your smile, let your smile change the world.

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Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have Internet connection.

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Nice shoes! Wanna screw?

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I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.

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If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?

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Face your problems, don't facebook them.