A real man gives up one night stands for a woman he can't stand one night without.
Winners don't wait for chances, they grab them.
Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.
You can't define love, but love can define you.
Every day you will meet a moron; if you haven't met one today, tomorrow you'll meet two.
You cannot fathom the amount of fuck I do not give.
If we're not supposed to have late night snacks....why is there a light in the fridge?
I will love you until the end. If you feel that I don't love you, this is just the beginning.
Boobs. That's all, just like this if you like boobs.
Chuck Norris will never die of a heart attack because his heart isn't that foolish to attack him.
Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I most need it.
Life is a bitch, but totally do-able.
Take chances, make mistakes, and don't regret a second of life.
If there was only woman ruling the word there would be no wars. Just a bunch of countries jealous of each other.
If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?
God must love stupid people. He made SO many.
