Always remember to smile.
The world is full of guys, be a man.
The awkward moment when a guy has bigger boobs than you.
You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.
Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.
I'm not a nerd, I'm just smarter then you.
No really officer, I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
It's weird not to be weird.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
Sex is like money. It's only a problem when you don't have any.
Those who criticize our generation forget who raised it.
Love is just a word, until someone comes along and gives it meaning.
Definition of disappointment: guy runs into a wall with a boner and breaks his nose first...
